On this blog, I write a lot about products and what you can do to make your skin look glowing and flawless. But are words like “glowing” and “flawless” even realistic? I firmly believe in accepting the way that you look in the present moment as beautiful. Maybe you don’t look the way you did when you were 24, but the chances are high that you didn’t like how you looked at 24 anyway. What will your future self fifteen years down the road think of how you look right now? Chances are, he/she thinks you look smoking, so enjoy it in the present instead of being wistful over the body type/skin you used to have.

When I used to do facials, I heard the same litany of skin woes all the time. There were plenty that were justified…I’m definitely not telling anyone they should embrace and love their acne. I’m just starting to see signs of losing elasticity in my neck, and you know what? That’s a great big pile of “nope!” for me. But there are some things that everyone has and maybe if we realized that we are not the only ones with these tiny flaws while the rest of the world frolics around with perfect, airbrushed skin, we’d feel better.

Blackheads:

We all have them. Do you want to know who doesn’t have them? Kids. That’s it. The minute you hit puberty, your pores fill up, and then the rest of your life is spent fighting them. Teenagers have them. All ethnicities have them. Old people have them. Yes, you will still have blackheads even after your skin dries up and starts to wrinkle. Life isn’t fair, Princess. Anyone who tells you differently is selling something. Slap on a clay mask when they get out of hand, but I assure you that your blackheads are not worse than anyone else’s.

Smile Lines/Crows Feet:

I can remember reading in The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera (or was it Slowness? Kundera fans, feel free to fact check me!) where one of the characters meets a woman who looks very young for her age, until she smiles, and then wrinkles etch over her skin. He wondered if she thought she looked young all the time because she would only see herself in the mirror and wouldn’t be smiling. Guess what, Kundera? Women are aware of what they look like when they smile. I remember clients complaining about their lines and I would tell them, “Those are from smiling! People who don’t have wrinkles are people who never smile.” This generally made the client feel better, because dammit, their lines were evidenced of a life well lived. Then I started getting them. Fuck. But unless you choose Botox (which, quite frankly, I think makes people look stiff and weird), you’re going to get those lines around your eyes and your mouth. You just are. The crepeiness (I think I just invented that word) that occurs from loss of collagen and elastin can be fought against, or at least pushed off until a future date, but smile lines are from muscle movement, and there’s not much you can do. This is something I have to keep in mind as I see those deep lines forming around my eyes when I smile. Life well lived, dammit!

Read the rest here.

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